Practicing Gratitude
“Thankfulness is the beginning of gratitude. Gratitude is the completion of thankfulness. Thankfulness may consist merely of words. Gratitude is shown in acts.” – Henri Frederic Amiel
In 1621, European settlers in Massachusetts, USA celebrated what has come to be regarded as the first thanksgiving in what they then called the New World. In 1798, George Washington penned the first declaration of Thanksgiving. He encouraged all Americans to express gratitude for the end of the Revolutionary War with their own feasts, surrounded by family and friends to be celebrated on November 26, 1789.
In 1863, during the third year of and perhaps the height of the Civil War, the nation was torn apart by polarizing politics and bloody battles. It was in this year that thousands lost their lives at places like Gettysburg, Vicksburg and Chickamauga. While there were glimmers of hope, such as the passage of the Emancipation Proclamation, many saw no end to the fighting and destruction. On October 3, 1863, President Abraham Lincoln issued a Thanksgiving Day proclamation encouraging Americans “in every part of the United States, and also those who are at sea, and those who are sojourning in foreign lands, to set apart and observe the last Thursday of November next as a Day of Thanksgiving and Prayer to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the heavens.” Thanksgiving has been celebrated in the United States ever since.
“The most powerful weapon against your daily battles is finding the courage to be grateful anyway.” – Unknown
Certainly not relegated to US history, nor requiring of life changing events - practicing gratitude isn’t a new concept – but perhaps often forgotten in the torrent of daily activities. For some of us, it is much easier to celebrate thanksgiving and practice gratitude when we overcome life’s trials and tribulations – and less so when we perceive to have things going our way. What about the impact on the time of the year? For those that celebrate national holidays around the concept of thanksgiving, what is it that leads to the transformation in your mindset? And why does it seem that the heightened sense of thankfulness seems to fade after the holidays pass?
“The miracle of gratitude is that it shifts your perception to such an extent that it changes the world you see.” – Dr. Robert Holden
Practicing gratitude can be life changing - it has far reaching effects, from improving our mental health, cognitive capacity, quality of sleep and enhancing our relationships with others. Living your life with gratitude helps you notice the little wins while being thankful for what you have – but more importantly, grateful for the relationships that matter most. It changes your inward focus to an outward expression – a selfish misperception to a relational embrace.
“What separates privilege from entitlement is gratitude.” – Brene Brown
Building your capacity for gratitude isn’t difficult but takes practice. It begins with limiting expectations and appreciating everything. A recognition that gratitude is the healthiest of all human emotions. Often remembrance that what you have now was once among the things you hoped for. It is one of the strongest and most transformative states of being as it shifts your perspective from lack to abundance. It allows you to focus on the good in your life, which in turn pulls more goodness into focus. It doesn’t align with entitlement but fosters a heart of thanksgiving.
“If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, ‘thank you,’ that would suffice.” – Meister Eckhart
Although most of us will never know what it is like being in the middle of a Civil War, practicing gratitude is something that we can embrace regardless of our circumstances. Consider the steps below and watch the transformation begin:
1) Observe: Notice how you feel each time you sincerely say, “thank you”.
2) Engage: When your instinct to say ‘thank you’ arises – embrace it. As you become more accustomed to doing so, articulate what you are thankful for to that individual.
3) Reflect: Watch the response of others to your moment of gratitude – and recognize the impact on yourself as well.
4) Record: Establish a daily journaling practice in which you reflect and record moments of gratitude associated with ordinary events, your personal attributes, or valued people in your life gives you the potential to interweave a sustainable theme of gratefulness into your life.
“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words but to live by them.” —John F. Kennedy
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For those interested in the US Thanksgiving Proclamation, written by Secretary of State William Seward, for President Lincoln, the document can be found here. It is a great reminder for each one of us.