Won't You Be... My Mentor?
For me, it was during the mid-1970s. Whenever possible, my brother’s and I would sit down in-front of the old cathode-ray, console TV with rabbit ears for an antenna (yes, the big wood box with an 8 inch black and white screen) eagerly awaiting the next episode of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood.
“It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood… a beautiful day for a neighbor. Would you be mine? Could you be mine?”
As the show began, we would enthusiastically sing along with our ‘neighbor’. Of course, we didn’t change our shoes or put on a sweater – but it didn’t diminish the connection.
It’s about the value of the connection.
He talked to us. And we talked to him. He always seemed to be looking right at me (albeit through the TV screen) and I at him. He would speak, and I would listen. He would ask questions, and I would answer. He talked about aspects of life that I was going through – providing insight and encouragement. And he told me he liked me just the way I was – and I believed him.
The late Fred Rogers was the creator of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood as well as the host of all 895 episodes, the composer of its more than 200 songs, and the puppeteer who imagined 14 characters into being. More importantly, he changed the face of children’s television and transformed the way we think about the inner lives of young children.
He was a voice that spoke to me, not down on me but rather on my level, about my feelings, about my challenges and explained some of the harder concepts that any child would need to learn.
Disarming, honest, and believable.
He believed in the value of others. He believed in the need to bring value to others. And he chose to do it in a disarming manner that engaged children (of all ages) to learn about the environment around them while also addressing difficult topics around real life issues.
As an adult, I think about the opportunities that I have been given to serve as a mentor. And the fact that not only is it a choice, but sometimes a sacrifice. A sacrifice with a greater value proposition - a personal exchange where we impact the future of another.
While the origins of mentoring date back to Odysseus, who entrusted his son to Mentor while away to fight the Trojan wars. So Mentor became a trusted advisor, teacher and friend to Telemachus – demonstrating the attributes we ascribe to mentorship today.
A simple question: For whom are you a trusted advisor, teacher, and friend?
Would you say that relationship is characterized by mutual respect, trust, shared values, effective communication and belief in that individual?
Are you willing to anchor on trust while humbly sharing insights of past successes and failures – while recognizing that you’ve been given 2 ears and 1 mouth, and that ratio should be applied in each exchange?
Disarming, honest and believable.
Have we lost that ability? Or have we allowed experience to taint our perspective?
Despite what is commonly portrayed today, I don’t believe what Mr. Rogers stood for is lost. But it is also something that perhaps doesn’t garner the attention that it should – or recognized for the value that it adds.
When asked of his contributions, Rogers replied, “I’d like to be remembered for being a compassionate human being who happened to be fortunate enough to be born at a time when there was a fabulous thing called television that could allow me to use all the talents that I had been given to impact the lives of children and their families.”
Each episode ended with Rogers singing "It's Such a Good Feeling", taking off his sneakers saying, "You're alive", grabbing his dress shoes to put back on, and then snapping his fingers two times. He would then reverse his opening - going into the closet, taking off his cardigan, hanging it up, and placing his jacket back on. Yet, just before Rogers got ready to go out the door he reminded each of us: "You always make each day a special day. You know how: By just you being yourself. There's only one person in the whole world that's like you, and that's you. And people can like you exactly the way you are…”
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As you move forward in life and in your career, I want to challenge you to be a mentor (as Rogers was for myself – followed by many others). Think about those people that gave of themselves to breath life into you. And recognize there is no lack of need for positive influence in society today. Make a connection and watch the world open up for someone else.
Fred Rogers’ relentless commitment to all that is best in people led to an astonishing range of honors including being inducted into the Television Academy’s Hall of Fame, receiving more than 40 honorary degrees, and in 2002 receiving the Presidential Medal of Freedom. For him, it wasn’t about success, it was about significance.
Like Mr. Rogers, I believe in the ability you have to bring value to others. Take courage and step out. I am honored to walk alongside of you on this leadership journey. And as he would often say during the show,
I am Proud of You!
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Action Items:
1) Take a few minutes to make a list of 3 people whose influence, or mentorship have had significant impact on your life. Make a point to write them a letter or contact one person each week and thank them for valuing you and providing a positive impact.
2) Make a list of those who you currently mentor and reflect on the importance of this relationship and let them know that you value the exchange.